well, well, well. when mac asked me start writing a relationship advice column for his blog twice a week, i figured i could definitely get my carrie bradshaw on. i'm going to be hitting ya'll with a post every monday && friday so you can get your weekly dose && an extra special tid bit for the weekend. before you read any further, there is one thing you must know about [miss dig.]: i tend to think, date, and expect like a man. i have had few "real relationships" [2, if you're counting] and spent most of my high school, college && today years as a single, happy lady that listens and experiences relationships as they come to my girls, and guys. it's through all of their problems, stories, positive and negatives that i learned and shaped my behaviors. && i've always been friends with mostly guys. i like sports, i don't mind a video game, i'm extremely laid back && i almost always agree with the guy. when my girls come to me for advice i lay it out there... and it works. they either get the guy, or feel better about themselves when they don't. && i'm single because i choose to be. [dig.] is my boyfriend, if that helps. i do get what i want though, dont get it twisted :)
so this week i leave you with this:
IN THE INDUSTRY: dating/living/whatever-you-want-to-call-it in the industry.
the industry is music, fashion, photography, movies, -- we are all one. && when you enter the realm of art you are inevitably forced into a world of politics, shows, appearances--you are now in the light... no matter how big or small. there is always a beginning. whether you are guy/or girl in the industry out on the scene or the guy/girl that's involved with someone in the industry there's certain things i've noticed about both:
GIRLS/GUYS that are in the industry-- single, and available: the one thing you have to remember is to just be honest. if all you want is a regular fuck, then tell them that. if you want an open relationship and the rest of your lives isn't talked about then tell them that. if you're just busy && want nothing serious, tell them that. the key is being completely 100 when you're single. WHY LIE? you have nothing to lie about, and really nothing to explain. no matter how raw the truth-- relationships, or wifey will come along when the time is right. in the mean time, you have no one to answer to but yourself.
knowing your limits is the other half of the battle--it's kind of like knowing your liquor limits. how hard do you really want to go? quality over quantity is how you should approach it--don't lose your standards just because it's 'always available', safe sex && privacy are important. people already know you get mad butt, or atleast think you do--you don't have to be all over the place talking about it && you definitely want to make sure that you're other 'person' knows how important it is to keep things discreet...
speaking of which...
GIRLS/GUYS that are dating, following, interested in, labeled a "potential"... someone in the industry-- far and wide as the people closest to them [family, friends, crew] to the people farthest to them [acquaintance's, groupies, haters] the rule of thumb is, "DONT BE A CLING ON" [thank you, alicia] there is always a man in the relationship, as there is always the female. sometime the girl "wears the pants", and vice versa. the secret is to understand that boys will be boys, and girls will be girls. they think differently... and that's just the way it is.perfect example: if you're man is playin video games with his boys and you are mad cause he's not paying attention to you, you're being a selfish bitch. you should be asking him if he wants something to drink... chips, salsa, queso? no, really. you shouldn't even be upset in the first place && a real female knows that it's what boys do... you want to keep him around? play your part && i guarantee when he's ready to quit the single life he'll be calling your number first to wife you up. make it a point to learn && understand the politics of it all. sometimes he/she will have to go out to an event, or do something for the job && you can't be all crazy asking a bunch of unnecessary questions... KNOW YOUR PLACE. until he/she has decided personally to live the committed life you can't change them. so enjoy the person for who they are, not what they are && be honest with your feelings... the first step is accepting the "relationship" for what it is.
something to sleep on...
have you evaluated your situations lately? are you being honest with yourself and the other person, or are you leading them on, confusing and deceiving them? are you being overly obsessive, jealous for no reason-- or crossing boundaries that haven't been earned? make it a point to reflect on how you want your life to be lived && don't stray from getting everything that makes you happy.
i'm out!
peep the radio show every friday from 7-9 [HIPHOPMELTDOWN. WPTS 92.1 www.wptsradio.org]
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love.sex.knowledge.
missdig.!
